Valuable things that you need

Since the economy is not real good right now, people are looking for ways to make money.
Here at The Angry Republican, we have compiled a list of “things” that could become valuable over time, because of their historical content.
If you see any of these things, you may want to save them because they could be valuable in the future..!!
Let’s get started…

President Obama’s new Food and Drug Administration Chief is Margaret Hamburg. So, be on the lookout for a headline that reads:
“..Hamburg warns of the danger of eating hamburg..”

(OK, I admit that one was too easy. Let’s try another…)

If you can find any picture that shows what Republicans think that Democrats are talking about, when Democrats talk about “sex education for school children.”

That picture could be valuable in the future, also…

Keep any official government document with the term “terrorist” or “enemy combatant” written on it. This government document could pull in some decent buck..!!
President Obama has stated that he will no longer use the terms: Terrorist, or enemy combatant, or prison camp.

The new term that President Obama wants you to use is: “social confinement commune.”
It’s a great term..!! (Social Confinement Commune.)
A commune is a happy place where everything is provided for you. You need not do a thing or lift a finger. It is social, there are LOTS of people around you. And you are confined and cannot EVER leave.
Look for Big money from BIG places…

Look for and save a copy of “The Daily Show with Jon Stewart” where he tears into “Mad Money’s Jim Cramer.”

It is valuable because it shows a democrat going after someone who TALKS about the economy, (as opposed to going after someone who actually hurt the economy like: Chris Dodd, Barney Frank, Alan Greenspan, or Hank Paulson.)
Stewart winds up, he swings, and slams the ball into LEFT field..!! (Out of bounds, strike one.)

For Jon Stewart’s next “hard hitting” interview, he will address steroid use in baseball. Jon Stewart will whip the crap out of Bob Costas. (Bob Costas: is a sportscaster. Costas doesn’t play baseball or take steroids, however he does talk about baseball on TV.)
Also valuable one day…

Modern “Tea Parties” are becoming a common thing. These people gather to protest BIG government spending and BIG government power over your freedom.
A printed notice of one of these “tea parties” during the Obama administration is not very valuable because there are many of them. However, a printed notice of a “Tea Party” during the Bush administration is worth money.
(Think about that one, for a minute..!!)
Also valuable…

A copy of former college professor Ward Churchill singing: “God bless America” or “The National Anthem” will sell for a million bucks. Snatch one up if you can find it.
(Come on… Ward Churchill had to have attended a baseball game. Maybe he started to mumble “The National Anthem” or “God bless America” by accident?)
Also valuable to collectors…

Rush Limbaugh is sick from a cold or flu, twice every month. Matter of fact, Rush was sick last Monday and almost didn’t do his show. If you can find an audio tape of Rush Limbaugh selling “Airborne” cold remedy (Airborne: is supposed to stop or shorten a cold) snatch that audio tape up. More valuable yet: if you can find a commercial with Rush selling Airborne while hacking and coughing; you have struck gold..!!
The money rolls in…

If you can find a video tape of Barack Obama telling America that he will stop earmarks. Any video clip where Obama stated that he will not sign bills filled with earmarks, will be as valuable as President George HW Bush saying: “Read my lips, no new taxes.”

Here’s another one…

If you can find any property with one of Glenn Beck’s bomb shelters built on it, BUY IT. It will be valuable.

(How to recognize a Glenn Beck bomb shelter?)
Glenn Beck’s bomb shelters are similar to other bomb shelters as in: it is filled with can food, guns, survival books, and bottled water. However, Beck’s shelter is different because it is filled with copies of the book “The Christmas Sweater” to sell to the masses after he peeks outside.
And Beck’s Bomb shelter comes complete with a radio broadcast booth and transmitter so he can continue to broadcast “Mor-on Trivia” even after the fall of Western society.
(Note) don’t be confused with the “old” bomb shelters that Beck built for terrorism 3 years ago.
(Also Note) don’t be confused by the bomb shelters that Beck built for Mexican people flooding into America last year.
We are talking about the current Beck bomb shelters; built to protect Beck from total economic collapse of the Western World.
And finally…
President Obama’s: “Hope and Change.”

If you can find it…

It’s really, really valuable..!!