Obama takes Guam (by 7 votes)

All of us Americans are quite familiar with the US Island of Guam, after spending many years studying Guam in the public schools.

Guam is the 32nd largest American Island and is shaped like a male penis.

Guam played a huge role in American politics this week, as marking a comeback for Barack Obama after losing badly in Pennsylvania.

Obama managed to take the Island, which has a population of about 155,000 people. Obama’s victory by 7 votes is a sure sign that he has overcome the Rev. Wright controversy and is moving forward. The people of Guam were not concerned with Obama’s past relationships. They were interested in the Guam economy, and which candidate could place a magic spell on fish; to cause then to multiply.

Let’s see how the people of Guam voted:

 

Of those people who weave baskets, the voter turnout was about equal:

We see almost the same results when it comes to voters who make Banana fiber skirts.

It is a virtual tie.

However…

 

When we look at people who chant, who also play a belembaotuyam- (a gourd type instrument), Obama has the advantage.

Clearly, Obama has won over people who play a gourd and chant.

The people of Guam were not interested in “nasty politics” and non-issues like Rev. Wright.

 

This could off-set Hillary’s victory in Pennsylvania where Hillary appealed to voters who read the Bible, cling to their guns, eat Pork Rinds, and shun anyone who is different- (IE- people who have teeth and an education.)

Confused about Pennsylvania Voters..??

The 12th Angry Republican Video Broadcast will fill you in on Pennsylvania Voters.

Confused about Obama and Reverend Wright..??

The 9th Angry Republican Video Broadcast will educate you on that topic.

After the stunning victory of Obama in Guam, all eyes will now turn to this Tuesday’s election.

Here at The Angry Republic, we will be “on the air” Wednesday Night to decipher what took place on Tuesday.

Thanks for reading (and watching) The Angry Republican

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